LISA'S COLLECTION

Children and Allowances

2012-01-25T11:05:00.001-05:00

Before I discuss my views on allowances let me go bar my front door, pull my shades, and shut off all my lights. I need to hide from those who will want to tar and feather me.

Ok - here goes:
I don't believe in allowances, and I don't believe kids need allowances in order to learn the value of money or importance of managing it wisely. In fact, particularly today, I believe that too much money when kids aren't old enough (or willing) to work for it can create problems that would not otherwise have arisen.

Does An Allowance Really Send the Right Message?

The Winters, Springs, Summers, and Falls of My Discontent in The Age of Online Writing

2012-01-25T10:49:00.002-05:00

My reading and writing life began long before anyone had ever imagined this thing we now know as, "The Internet".

My entire first year in elementary school was spent waiting for the next piece of phonics, which would move me that much closer to being able to read whatever I wanted to read. Even without having gone through all the sounds, I was delighted to discover that learning to recognize even some consonants, vowels, and blends allowed me to sound out photo captions in the daily newspaper my parents always left out on the table. Reading was, to me, one of the greatest pleasures in life.

Like most little kids, I "made books" as a young child. Like only the verbally-inclined among us, I would later become a kid who thrived on things like essay questions and any homework that involved writing.

My sister is four years older than I, and I longed for the day when I could read "grown-up" books, like those she brought home from school. When I was in third- or fourth-grade I'd seek out the biggest, fattest, books (with as few pictures as possible) and enjoy hours of being engrossed in reading. All through my childhood I gravitated toward reference books, but it was once I'd finished school that I had the time and freedom to begin reading whatever text/reference books I wanted to read (rather than reading what someone else told me I had to read).

I grew up to be an avid reader (sort of compulsive reader), reading everything from shampoo-bottle labels to text/reference works intended mostly for people in specific professional fields (or aiming to work in them). Magazines were something I really enjoyed, and I only read the ones that offered articles that had substance. I can probably count the number of times I've ever looked at Vogue. To me, that was "nothing but pictures". I read Redbook (with its 3000-word articles AND other material that interested young women. Psychology Today, Mademoiselle, Working Woman, Cosmopolitan, MS, and any number of others that had "real" articles in them were among my magazine-reading.

As far as I writing goes, from the time I saw what struck me as the "brilliance" and the "science" of being able to put together a couple of simple letters and have them mean something; to the time I saw the power in putting together a few simple words and having them move someone; I've loved writing - any kind of writing whatsoever.

And such is the history I brought with me into my first explorations of what, not so long ago, was "this new thing, the Internet".

It wasn't long before Internet writing sites and blogs came along. Coincidentally, this was around the time when tv programs and commercials began speeding up the rate at which viewers heard things; as well as "zipping up" and "speeding up" the general presentation because of the general consensus that "people have short attention spans".

As someone who likes to write, I, of course, began looking at blogs and writing sites to see if there was some outlet for my own writing. Although blogs have since become part of many businesses, the first were mostly written by individuals as daily journals. Since I don't happen to be very interested in the day-to-day doings of strangers who aren't doing anything all the Earth-shattering, I kept looking, to see if I could find more interesting blogs. What I discovered was that not all blogs are journals (which at least do have real writing with at least someone else's version of substance/a story). What I noticed was that a whole lot of blogs seem to be nothing but pictures, single-lines, links to other stuff (or other non-stuff) and anything else that the creator dreamed up to throw into the mix. Most blogs like this have an impressively polished appearance, to the point where my own inadequacy in creating something so visually impressive scream at me. " Still, with each impressively polished looking blog, most often I'd just find myself asking, "What on Earth is all this crap?" - and move on. I wasn't looking for "flashes" of words and links and images. I was hoping to find writing - real writing, complete with substance, words strung together to form grammatically correct sentences, sentences carefully crafted to present a larger pictures, writing that taught me something, helped me to understand someone else, made me laugh, maybe even made me cry.

While I understand that one teenager's potpourri of words and pictures associated with an ever-exciting life will appeal to any number of other teenagers, I'm not a teenager. Teens and the under-25 set are, of course, welcome to the Internet with which they've pretty much grown up; but the world is made up of a whole lot of people who aren't under 25. Maybe it's not considered "standard" these days, but I happen to be someone with a very long attention span. What's worse (for me or others, I'm not sure which) is that I'm someone who processes information through auditory means, which means I've never been one to really appreciate pictures. Even as a kid I despised comic strips. I didn't automatically see what was happening without having to slowly figure out what each character was doing in each frame; and the whole process was just aggravating. I once read that only 20% of people take in information through auditory processing, and 20% process information kinesthetically. The remaining 60% processes information visually (if the numbers I read are accurate), which means, of course, that the person who doesn't appreciate impressive graphics is in the minority.

Since, apparently, the long attention span (which served me so well when I was a kid in school; or, for that matter, in all other situations in life) has become out-of-fashion, I've become acutely aware that in the world of the Internet I'm pretty much a misfit. For everyone who seems absolutely content with finding a 400-word summary (and pretty much the same one as what 8 billion other sites offer) on any topic, when I search I want to find substance. When I'm looking for any kind of reading at all I'm looking for substance. While some people say they find "long writing" boring, I'm bored by other people's quickie notes, flashes of words and pictures, and ability to fill a most impressive appearing page with a bunch of nothing.

Anyone who as spent any time at all on writing sites has probably discovered the frequency with which remarks about how "nobody wants to read long stuff" are made. In over three years of writing online, I can't say I've ever heard anyone say, "I'm looking for substance." I've been shocked to discover that in debates about the importance of using proper grammar, it is usually a minority of people who think grammar matters in writing. The general online majority seems to agree that "nobody cares about grammar; all anybody cares about is what someone says."

The same division is there between people who "don't want to read some big, long, thing" when searching for an article; and those who don't want yet another carbon copy of every other 400-word blip that's online about any subject. Recently, I had something fairly important I was looking up; and I felt like I'd tear out my hair if I ran into yet one more quickie paragraph about a subject on which I needed real information.

It's not for me to question the wisdom of people who say, "nobody wants some big, long, thing". On writing sites it isn't just other writers who say that. It's anyone who knows what people are looking for (or at least who we trust to know what people are looking for). I can write a 400- or 500- word "blurb" of any article as well the next Internet writer can. There's no reason I can't abandon my own writing preferences and "give the people what all the other people say they want"
.
Anybody who knows anything about the Internet knows that people have short attention spans - not long ones. Nobody but wants more 500 words about anything.

The thing is, though, that I don't want to write that same, condensed, 500-word, "blurb" (aka, "article") that "everyone else" has also written. As far as I'm concerned, if you've seen one quickie article on PVC piping you've pretty much seen them all. I know that for every time I've landed on some flashy, without-substance, page that causes me to think, "What the hell is all this crap?", someone probably lands on my pages of wordy text and thinks the very same thing.

In a few years of always feeling somewhat torn about what I "should be" putting online, what most people seem to do, and what I want to put online; I've so often felt inferior; because my writing is often neither a great piece of fiction nor a short-and-to-the-point, carbon copy, of every other searchable article out there. My blogs don't look like other people's blogs. They're not business blogs, but they're not cool, flashes of color, images, and quickie blips of words that will presumably grab someone's (although most likely not an adult's) attention. Instead of flashy pictures I've actually placed "introductions to what this is" on blogs I started as a way to create a home for some of my writing. I've haven't yet gotten past the stage of "include the starter-stuff first and make things more polished and 'bloggish' later".

I know I could be earning a lot more online that I do, if only I'd abandon what I really want to write and write what "everyone else" says makes the best money. Then again, if I abandon the kind of writing I think may offer "substance" (to anyone who has the patience to get through it), what's the point of writing at all? I can make money doing any number of things. Why settle for the low, Internet-writer, pay most people get?

And what, exactly, is the "kind of writing" I want to do? Any kind (or at least most kinds that don't involve writing yet another 400-word blurb of an article that looks like a million others online). I suppose there's a part of me that hopes to write something that will help someone else understand something about any given experience/situation in life; or else (as many writers hope) to let someone else know he is not alone in some situation.

While I leave most of the marketing to the marketing-inclined; and while I usually leave the science and medicine to the professionals; I usually write as someone who has spent time just being a person, and who sometimes hopes that others may benefit, learn, understand more, or be touched by something I've written. It takes a certain amount of bravery, and a definite need to set aside a little pride, to keep on posting material that will never be what "professional Internet people" say is what people want; or material aimed at capturing the short attention spans of, apparently, most of the Internet world. There's probably not a moment when I'm writing online that I don't have in the back of my head that what I'm writing isn't really what anyone wants. After all, this is the Internet. People don't want serious. They don't want long. They don't "lacking-in-colorful-pictures". Don't forget, most don't even (apparently) want good use of grammar.

The fact is, in this Internet age, people don't always particularly appreciate the kind of writing that was the kind that pulled many of us into a passion for writing and reading. Hey, Charles Dickens and Charlotte Bronte were "then". Heck, even Erma Bombeck was "then". This is "now". This is the Internet age. People have short attention spans (well, at least everyone other than I; and I still say I kind of resent being made to feel out-of-fashion over that).

Still, when all is said and done, most of us do write what we want to write. It's fine that a teen somewhere wants to express a little artistic creativity, while also entertaining his/her friends. It's fine that people who care nothing about writing will put together a quickie article in the hopes of earning some part-time income from it. Variety is the spice of life, and it's fine that the Internet is the Internet - and expecting more is usually expecting too much.

Here's the thing, though. For everyone who only wants to find the quickie article or the flashy blog, there are people who are looking for something more. Not long ago, a lady commented on one of my "big, long, serious" Hubs, which she found "by accident", as she searched. Out of respect for her (and the very sobering situation she's in), I won't share details; but I was incredibly moved and humbled when she said I had put into words exactly what she has been trying to express to people around her, as she tries to help them understand "where she is" at this stage in her situation.

Back when I was in my teens and expressed my interest in writing with my closest two girlfriends, they would joke about how I would one day write a bestseller, get to go on "The Johnny Carson Show", and have to select a great dress to wear. We didn't take any of it all that seriously, as we talked about what kind of dress each of us would choose in such a situation. When I wasn't engaged in lighthearted talk about my wishes to one day write; and when, instead, I was asking myself what it was about writing that I found so appealing, I would imagine how a person could spend a lifetime writing and only make a difference in the life (or even the day) of one person. I was never sure how practical it was to imagine spending all those years writing only to have an impact on one person, but I guess imagining the potential of the same words reaching any number of people was appealing.

Having outgrown seeing any appeal in going on The Tonight Show in a great dress (not to mention that Mr. Carson has passed away, and it wouldn't be quite the same with Conan O'Brien hosting); and having even outgrown the thinking that a lifetime of writing would be worth it if my words could be helpful to one person; I still see "the writer in me" not so much as the author of a bestseller - but, instead, as simply a person who knows the potential power of the written.

I often wonder whether the Internet will eventually drive the people who like to read substance back to the shelves at their public library and local Barnes and Noble; and whether it will drive writers who generally aim for substance (even if they don't always succeed) back to query letters, file boxes, and hat boxes on the top shelf of the closet. Then, again, I sometimes imagine an Internet-revolution-revolution, where the "favor-ers" of substance may eventually drive the "favor-ers" of "fluff, quick, and color" are driven to their own corner of the Internet world; and where the general consensus changes from "nobody wants long writing" to "everybody demands at least a certain amount of substance".

As I said at the very beginning here, I have always loved all kinds of writing and reading. I have to say I more value, say,. Charles Dickens over the label on a shampoo bottle; and I'd like to say, too, that I don't particularly think the kind of writing I do ought to be the only kind on the Internet.

What bothers me, though, is that the Internet community so often sends the message that nobody wants anything that isn't one of those 500-word, condensed, articles that can found all over the 'Net; nobody wants "in-depth", and truly nobody wants "long". Between traffic concerns, attention-span concerns, and general impatience; most writing that doesn't fall into the narrow definition of "what people want" isn't all that valued. One thing I often think, though, is that sometimes it isn't about what people want, as much as it is what they discover they didn't know they wanted.

I'll never be the next Charles Dickens, but sh/e is out there somewhere. Chances are there are lots of them out there somewhere. I'll never be the next Internet marketing guru either. I have nothing to splash onto MySpace or Facebook, and I really don't care about anything anyone Tweets in so few characters. I guess I'll just keep writing whatever I feel like writing when the mood strikes me, looking over my collection on online writing and thinking, "What a pile of crap. Nobody wants that kind of writing on the Internet or these days;" and generally not feeling all that great about the kind of writing I do.

Then again, though, every once in a while there is that occasional e.mail that tells me that something I wrote was found worthwhile by someone who read it. Maybe there is still redeeming value in writing that isn't particularly aimed at page-views or fleeting attention spans after all.

The Following Is A List of Things I Think I've Learned from Life

2012-01-25T09:20:00.002-05:00

1. Whether it's a bottle of shampoo, a jar of peanut-butter, or a stick of deodorant - Never throw away anything that's just about gone before you have the new one in hand, and at home. Trust me, if you do throw an almost-empty container away, one day you'll regret that you did. If you make sure you don't, one day you'll be glad you didn't.

2. Make it a habit to know you have your keys in pocket ANY time you leave your house, even for the mail. Again, one day you'll be glad you did. If you don't, you'll one day wish you had.

3. Don't point out to other people what's wrong with you. Sometimes they won't notice until you do. At other times they'll think you're only looking for compliments. Then again, there will be many times when they let you know they think you're underestimating your own flaws, leaving you to feel worse than ever.

4. "Accidents waiting to happen" doesn't mean something that only looks like an accident will result. An "accident waiting to happen" means an accident that will happen. It may not be today, and it may not be tomorrow or the week after next. The accident will happen, however - because it was waiting to happen. So take care of accidents waiting to happen immediately, because it's a rare accident that involves a happy outcome.

5. Don't clean your toilet bowl with glasses on, and if you must then make sure your face isn't over the bowl and that they aren't at all loose. (Need I say more?)

6. Along those lines, if you must flush a toilet that doesn't have a lid keep your mouth good and closed; and on a somewhat related note, never open a pull-top can of cat food without pursing your lips tightly either.

7. Don't say, "My parents did __________, and I'm OK." There's a good chance you're not as OK as you and your parents think you are. It's just that neither your parents nor you know any better.

8. Never leave your cell phone in your pocket when you use a public restroom (or private one, for that matter). If you absolutely must leave the phone in your pocket, make sure you store all your contacts on a back-up cell phone.

9. Just because your dainty little hand fits inside a wine glass that doesn't mean you should use it (even with a paper towel in it) to wash the inside of the glass. Let's just say some knuckles are apparently on the sharper side.

10. Snack foods in bags: There really is a good chance you "can't eat just one". Never buy these. (Also, never buy caramel rice cakes or Lindt truffles.)

11. Always look in the back seat of your car before getting in.

12. Also, always look inside your drip coffee maker if you live in a cold climate, it's May, and the space under your kitchen door is big enough to let (oh, let's say) about 30 ants in for breakfast.

13. Speaking of coffee (and any other beverage), always use a covered mug or cup in Summer, especially if you turn your lights off late at night and work by the light of the monitor. Little, tiny, flying bugs that like monitor lights also appear to like whatever human beings drink while they type. (If you can't follow this rule then at least keep a mini-flashlight on hand for checking between sips.) (Actually, the occasional, bigger, bug may find its way into your cup - but let's not think about THAT.)

14. Before throwing your laundry into the machine, if you think you really should check all pockets for tissues; follow your instinct. You might think shredded up tissue bits aren't much different from dryer lint, but they are.

15. Never sit with a baby over six months old on your lap, with the little cutie facing away from you. Sudden jumps back, baby heads, and noses have a tendency to combine in a most unpleasant and painful way.

16. Speaking of babies, always carry babies through doorways upright. It's really easy to underestimate the length between a horizontal baby's toes and head while overestimating the width of the doorway. (Note: If an unfortunate incident occurs, chances are the baby will be OK. They usually are.)

17. In stop-and-go traffic, never stop on railroad tracks just because there's no sign of a train coming. Make sure the car ahead of you has left enough room for you to clear the tracks before you move forward.

18. Never click, "Don't ask me this again", when it comes to whether or not you want Itunes to ask if you REALLY want to delete that playlist.

19. Never carry a bottle of water in the same purse you keep your expensive camera in.

20. Have one place where you ALWAYS keep your keys, wallet, and cell phone (and boring and unadventurous as this may be, NEVER deviate.)

21. Never believe that you can explain your side better in an e.mail if you avoid the difficulties of trying to get the words out in person. Trust me - if the words were going to be a problem getting out in person, the tone of your voice isn't coming through via e.mail (even with the best emoticons).

22. If you have a cat, "running out" of paper towels isn't when the last roll is almost gone. It's when the back-up roll is opened.

23. If you're six years old, never put a dime in your mouth while you climb over a reasonably tall chain-link fence.

24. Don't think your boss will respect you more if you're honest about sleeping late. Some interpret such honesty as "not respecting him/her enough to think up a lie".

25. AAA will only come for the same problem a couple of times before they tell you to get it fixed because they're not going to come out again.

26. Don't panic if you're mixing up a brownie mix, add as much oil as you should be adding water, and vice verse. They come out OK (for the most part). They just take a lot longer to cook.

27. If there's something telling you you shouldn't do one thing or another, listen to that something 100% of the time - not 98% of the time. A lot of disasters can happen when you give them that 2% window of opportunity.

28. Blinds on a window can't be trusted as much as shades can.

29. Never leave electronic products within any area that could be covered by liquid if whatever is holding that liquid should tip. By the way, add several inches to your estimate of the diameter of that area.

30. If you must keep water, coffee, or tea near your keyboard, so be it. NEVER leave a glass of orange juice near it.

31. Mothers never know their kids as well as think they do, no matter how well they really do know them.

32. Kids never know their mothers as well as they think do, even though kids think they know more than mothers.

33. If you have to ask, "Should I take my umbrella?" take it. You can fend off a rainstorm that way much of the time, but if you don't you'll at least have an umbrella with you.

34. If it's "one size fits all" don't wear it. Nothing that comes in "one size fits all" is very attractive.

35. Never slam a drawer or door shut without making sure your fingers are tucked safely into your palms.

36. Don't think that just because ants show up in May a big, glass, peanut jar is a great place to store sugar; but if you do, don't wear sandals and make sure your hands are dry at all times.

37. When you're out in public push doors open with your forearms (surgeon style), use your wrists on handrails (especially the ones in the subway), and keep as big a space bubble around you as possible.

38. Always keep your shopping cart as far to one side of an aisle as possible. This prevents a whole store's worth of customers from thinking you're a giant idiot and telling their friends and relatives about you once they're out of the store.

39. (Toilets again): If the present roll of tissue is almost gone you're better off removing it and replacing it with the new one, rather than leaving the new one at risk of being knocked on the floor (that is if you're not a big fan of using tissue that's rolled all over a bathroom floor).

40. Staples can hold up a hem far longer than you would think.

41 Never completely trust anyone else's directional signals in traffic. They're sometimes only an estimate.

42. Don't walk into someone's home and immediately announce how you are by saying, "Oh - I am sooo sick!"

43. Don't ask people who invited you to their wedding if it's OK if you bring your kid. Most of the time it isn't, they won't want to say it is, and your kid will end up being resented for being there.

44. Rubbery soles on shoes are more dangerous, not less, on carpets and blacktop.

45. On the matter of shoes with rubbery soles: Just because you feel light and airy and in the mood to run across a busy street, that doesn't mean you should. Let's put it another way: If you think cars are going to stop just because your legs are stretched out into the street, think again.

46. The magnifying glass in the eyeglass repair kit will not do you any good when you need one hand for the little, tiny, screwdriver and the other hand to keep the little, tiny, screw in place.

47. Just because you have a cover on your soda it doesn't mean the birds can't aim for the opening of the straw.

48. Don't think just because the tube of hand cream says, "for extra dry and cracked hands" the clowns who thought up ingredients didn't put alcohol in it. Also, keep in mind that when the label says, "cooling" it means the cooling only happens after your hands feel like they're on fire for a couple of hours (because someone put ALCOHOL in this stuff).

49. You don't REALLY have to Spring Ahead and Fall Back at 2:00 a.m. You just have to do a little more math if you don't.

50. No, the fruit flies don't have some mechanism by which they can find your bunch of bananas from outside your house. The eggs are on the stems when you bring the bananas home, and it's only a matter of time before they hatch. Fortunately, bananas usually turn brown before the eggs hatch.

51. Don't leave dishes in the sink without rinsing the food off first. The whole task of washing them will be far more pleasant if you do.

52. The train you choose not to run to catch may well turn out to be one on which there was a stabbing.

53. Yes, maybe that IS too much ask (whatever it is you're asking this about).

54. Too much stuff always looks better if it's in neat piles and at right angles.

55. Whether or not you should wear your sweater or sweatshirt depends on whether you'll be more miserable cold or more miserable hot. Let your potential misery be your guide, but don't expect to be comfortable either way.

56. Don't buy that crap about lightning never striking twice.

57. Maybe it is always darkest before the dawn, but dawn doesn't offer any particular guarantees about how sunny and bright any one day will turn out to be.

58. Don't buy donuts from any place that lets flies get on them (and a surprisingly high number of donut places seem to be OK with flies getting on the donuts). Also, don't bother writing to a famous donut chain to complain about their local store letting flies get on the donuts. All they'll do is send you a coupon for yet more "fly-donuts".

59. You can't judge a book by its cover, but if someone looks creepy there's a really good chance they ARE creepy.

60. Bacteria or no bacteria, somehow it just seems better to keep your toothbrush covered.

Is Wearing Make-Up Dishonest?

2012-01-24T19:36:00.000-05:00

This was a topic of a discussion in an online forum. Someone said that women who wear make-up are dishonest. Although I didn't post my reply in the discussion, I did write one:

I'd disagree that wearing make-up is deceiving. When someone is wearing make-up it's pretty obvious they are (and if it's not obvious they are, then they aren't wearing enough of it to be deceiving). The very wearing of it does say something about the person who is wearing it, and one thing is that she's someone who wants to at least try to look her prettiest. With that reasoning, we should all stop using hair spray just to make sure people know the "truth" that our hair sometimes flies out of place; and we should stop using cologne so people know we really don't smell like spices or flowers (or whatever). And, we should stop getting clean so people will know we're not naturally just permanently all nice and clean all the time.

As for how honest I am, pretty much the only time I'll ever tell and out-and-out lie is if someone keeps asking me a question (or questions) that aren't his business, and if they don't take my not answering straight as a sign that it isn't their business. Then I'll just figure the person deserves to be lied to and lie. That doesn't happen very often AT ALL.

I don't tell everybody everything, so if not saying something amounts to being "dishonest" - then that's me. The only time I ever lied to one of my kids involved a discovered Christmas present and, of course, the whole Santa Claus and Tooth Fairy thing. I always told them the truth, but I told it in a way they could handle while also never being able to say they'd discovered I'd lied to them.

It isn't necessarily deception to tell the truth but not to tell everything. It just isn't.

Comments on Someone's Objection to Negative Comments In Discussions on an Internet Site

2012-01-24T19:30:00.000-05:00

I think negative comments or raising problems one is having is fine and important. Expecting nothing but pleasantness and neutrality in conversation/discussions is like expecting no bad news in the newspapers. I used to tell my kids, though, "If you're angry or upset we want you talk about it, and tell us; but people can be angry or upset and still act respectful toward others and be civil." There's a big difference between being unhappy with something that goes on (for example, on an Internet site) and implying that the people running the “show” (as well as any people not particularly running things) are "stupid" or "evil".

I don't even mind if someone (lots of people) have one, long-running, problem/issue and keep coming on and letting others know what's going on (or voice their own challenges with it). Again - important and constructive, in terms of the community's being informed about what's going on and any challenges.

There's a point, though, where things can turn from being legitimate, honest, sharing of stuff that's going on (including challenges and problems) into being unproductive, useless, boring, and "life-sucking" to others (who may or may not already be dealing with their own kind of dissatisfaction/concern and who really don't need anyone else working against their efforts to deal with his own version of the same issue(s) or deal with his own, different, set of challenges. There's also a difference between people who come on a site and imply (or say) that they essentially hate the site and/or have no use for it whatsoever - and yet who keep showing up on it anyway.

"What Are 'Adipose Hankies'"?

2012-01-24T19:23:00.001-05:00

The following piece was written as kind of joke, when several people on HubPages were joking about spun articles. Someone got the idea that it would funny if a bunch of people wrote their own Hub (article) about "adipose hankies". It was kind of a challenge. It was fun to see what I could come up with, and I ended up making my Hub partly joking/partly serious.

In any case, I left it on my HubPages profile for a few months, but it's not really the kind of thing I want on there. So, I decided to post it here instead. (I've really never had a lot of hope for its getting any traffic)

__________________________________

Has the presence of adipose hankies become too visible in modern-day society?

Author's Note: In a recent Internet-community discussion it became clear that a good number of people are apparently woefully oblivious to meaning of the term, "adipose hankies". As a result, the suggestion of creating Hubs for the purpose of also creating awareness (and, of course, informing readers) was made.

What exactly are adipose hankies?

It has only very recently come to my attention that yet another term for women's breasts is "adipose hankies". Although I've long been familiar with both the part of the anatomy to which this term applies, and although I've been familiar with the term, "adipose", for quite some time (although not nearly as long as with that particular part of the anatomy), the word, "hankie", is not one I've ever heard combined with "adipose" and/or associated with the part of the anatomy in question.

Including "adipose" in the phrase used to describe this part of the female anatomy does make sense, I suppose. After all "adipose" is related to fat, and we all know that there's a certain amount of fatty tissue that makes up adipose hankies. It's the word, "hankie", that I'd never heard applied to the body area in question. To the best of my understanding, the use of the word "hankie" has its origins in the fact that the part of the anatomy in question has been known to "catch crumbs", and since hankies are apparently also associated with catching crumbs; the two terms are at times used interchangeably when clarifying the exact type of adipose tissue to which the speaker/writer is referring.

Being acutely aware that not all adipose hankies do, in fact, catch crumbs; and being someone who tends to use only napkins (and most often my own stainless steel kitchen sink) for catching errant crumbs; I just didn't automatically associate the word, ":hankies", with that part of the anatomy. Also, I've never used the word, "hankie", at all; because the last time I used ANY handkerchief was when I was seven years old and making my First Communion, and was given a pretty little handkerchief for the little white pocketbook girls were given to carry in the procession. At the time, I just thought of it as a "handkerchief". I would later, of course, hear classmates refer to disposable tissues as "hankies". In my family, we just said "Kleenexes". In any case, this is apparently where the term, "adipose handkies" most likely got its roots. (Actually, as I write this and imagine the much more recent advent of Internet article "spinners" (programs into which a write can feed a piece of writing and have the words changed as a way of coming up with a whole new article), I can see how the words "Kleenex", "tissue", and "hankies" could be used interchangeably (even if not entirely the most accurate at all times).

The above two paragraphs pretty much explain what the term means, but what about whether or not our society has become inundated with sightings of adipose hankies in settings and places where - really - some people may find them inappropriate? (Please keep in the mind that it is neither the actual existence of "hankies" to which I'm about to refer, but sightings and images of them that, in my opinion, have become, essentially, potential "fashion don't's" at the very least.)

Being of a generation that has been far freer to discuss certain aspects of sexuality and anatomy than generations before it, I realize that my own reticence about discussing SOME things in public may not be in keeping with my own generation. I know "in my head" (I put quotation marks there because I'm aware that all knowing is really in our heads, so that's a kind of stupid thing to say; but anyway..) that there's nothing a person should feel embarrassed about in discussing adipose hankies. Yet, while I'm certainly not embarrassed by their existence (on me or on anyone else), I do have that little bit of reticence. (It's worth noting that adipose hankies aren't something only women have. There is actually something called, "man-adipose-hankies", but man-adipose- hankies are beyond the scope of this particular Hub.)

Upon reflecting on the question of whether we're seeing far more (shall I call it) "adipose-hankie-age" in society than I happen to prefer, I realize that must somewhat uncomfortably associate myself with some people of a slightly earlier generation than my own. (I'm not talking about the Victorian Era. I have a slightly more recent generation than that in mind.) Then again, I suppose I very comfortably associate with my own generation's role in aiming to encourage women to be more comfortable with who/what they are, as well as to aim not to be viewed as "sex objects". As I try to think of what points I want to make about adipose hankies (beyond just what they are), I realize it is my own unfashionable reticence about discussing them that prevents me from just getting to the point and sayng what I have to say. (And, before you start thinking my reticence about discussing this particular part of the anatomy in too much detail or depth is rooted in anything related to that First Communion I mentioned previously, I assure you it has nothing to do with the Catholic upbringing that I rejected as soon as I was old enough to do so.)

In any event, here's what I have to say about adipose hankies:

1). Adipose hankies come in a variety of sizes. Ideally, each individual should have adipose hankies in a size that she finds perfect for her. Many women, of course, are not happy with the size of adipose hankies they have.

(Oh, wait. I think I'm using the term for this part of the anatomy too much here. Somebody may think I'm "keyword stuffing". I think I'll now switch to using the initials, "A.H." Oh wait, I can't use those initials. They mean something else to some people in some segments of society. I'd use the correct term, which I did mention above - but that gets into my weird, yet very mild, discomfort about using that word in public. Besides, I'm not sure how many times I can use that particular "B word" without making Google or HubPages upset. I'm not a big fan of the word, "boobs", for some reason. I don't know... I just got used to thinking of the word, "boob", as it is used to refer to someone who is of questionable intellect (or whatever) (as in "boob-tube"). OK, I'm going to refer to the part of the anatomy in question as "hanks" from here on. I just have to hope people who share the name of "Hanks" don't think I'm calling them "boobs".)

OK. Moving on to the rest of what I have to say about hanks as I attempt to address the all-important question posed in the title of this Hub:

2) While I have absolutely no problem whatsoever with the existence of the hanks, I do find that I'm seeing far too many of them showing up inappropriately. For example, one horribly cold and windy February day my eyes were assaulted by a giant case of exposed cleavage at the local Burger King restaurant, where I'd gone for a simple cup of coffee with a companion. Everybody else was wearing their Winter coats (and more), and a young woman was walking around in a top that would have been awfully revealing in August. In February it just looked stupid. I'm not too happy to see increasing incidents of cleavage exposure on professional, TV-news, reports or anchors. To me, cleavage should be for the academy awards - not TV news. Walter Cronkite didn't resort to this type of thing. (Those of us who recall or have seen Cronkite's announcement of President Kennedy's death may have noticed that Cronkite did "the eyeglasses thing". I kind of do the eyeglasses thing, all that I'd like to make it clear that I'm not trying to be like Walter Cronkite because 1) I'm only Hubbing, and 2) I have my own adipose hankies (oops - I mean hanks) if I really need to try to emulate today's TV news women.

Personally, as a woman, I don't really get the apparent appeal that hanks seem to have for some people. I suppose that's because I'm a woman. I don't want to get into what purposes they do or don't serve here, and I don't want to get into the whole very serious issue of breast health (this Hub isn't the place for that kind of seriousness). As a woman, I pretty much don't do a lot of thinking about hanks (not even "man-hanks") Hanks exist. They're fine. Personally, I don't feel like looking at cleavage everywhere I look, but I'm willing to accept that not everyone is going to be willing to tone it down on some of the widespread, rampant, and extreme cleavage showing just because I'm not interested in seeing other women's hanks.

My answer to the question about whether adipose hankies (I've added a-whole-nother bunch of words here, so I'm assuming using that term might be OK keyword-wise at this point) are often too visible in today's society, I would have to conclude that the answer would be a matter of opinion and based on the preferences of the observer in question.

Coffee and Candor: An Introductory First Post

2012-01-24T01:38:00.000-05:00

Coffee and Candor: An Introductory First Post: For a long time now, and even though online writing has afforded me a certain amount of flexibility, I haven't really just written what I fe...

Coffee and Candor: January 25 - An Anniversary That I Need To Write A...

2012-01-24T01:37:00.001-05:00

Coffee and Candor: January 25 - An Anniversary That I Need To Write A...: Because I've been aware that January 25 is approaching, I feel the need to at least acknowledge. It's an anniversary for me, and it's a twe...''

With increasing awareness that I'm thinking that becoming "an Internet recluse" might be a better and better idea (contrary to the the most popular idea that people should get themselves and their writing more and more "out there"), I started a new blog that has no purpose other than offering me a place to just write whatever I feel like writing (the way a lot of people write on blogs). I'm still in the process of aiming to do whatever it is I've been aiming to do, but I have to stop worrying about a lot of stuff and just do my own thing every once in awhile. (It may look to some people as if I HAVE been doing my own thing, but that's only how it looks. Long story involving my own approach to Internet writing endeavors. That's for another day. In the meantime, "Coffee and Candor" will, I hope, offer not a shred of redeeming value to anyone (not directly, not indirectly, not at all).

I'm sick of aiming for "useful" and "informative" (and I'm even sick of trying to save little corners of the world by "promoting understanding in the smallest of ways).

Part II - Inequality, Rights, and Respect (A Look At Prejudice and Ignorance in 2012 America)

2012-01-20T09:02:00.000-05:00

Part II - Inequality, Rights, and Respect (A Look At Prejudice and Ignorance in 2012 America)

Part I - Inequality, Rights, and Respect (A Look At The Prejudice and Ignorance That Still Exists In 2012 America)

2012-01-20T09:00:00.000-05:00

Part I - Inequality, Rights, and Respect (A Look At The Prejudice and Ignorance That Still Exists In 2012 America)

Personalized Searching, Connected Accounts, and Other Internet Features I Don't Want

2012-01-12T03:16:00.001-05:00

Personalized Searching, Connected Accounts, and Other Internet Features I Don't Want

With the start of the new year, I've decided to do some trimming out of some things as far as Internet activities go. It's not just related to what I write or where I write, but also some of the other activities (namely, feeling compelled to at least try to pretend to socialize on "social sites", for one thing). There are a lot of Internet trends that I don't think are all that great (or at least not great for me) and - I don't know.. - I just have to reclaim a little of my online life, you know? I'm not getting any younger, and my online activities aren't particularly getting any more fulfilling.

Pondering The Question, "If You Were In A Position of Power What Would You Do?"

2012-01-11T03:23:00.001-05:00

Pondering The Question, "If You Were In A Position of Power What Would You Do?"

This was a question someone asked on HubPages' "Answers" section, so I thought it might fun to try to answer it - and it was.

Of Morals, Atheists, and Agnostics - A Reply to a Question About Where Morals Come From

2012-01-07T04:51:00.000-05:00

Of Morals, Atheists, and Agnostics - A Reply to a Question About Where Morals Come From

Will America Face Another Civil War? An Opinion in Response to That Question

2011-12-12T07:40:00.000-05:00

Will America Face Another Civil War? An Opinion in Response to That Question

Are Intelligent People More Likely to Abuse Drugs?

2011-11-16T19:20:00.000-05:00

Are Intelligent People More Likely to Abuse Drugs?

The Christmas Angel - A Poem

2011-11-16T00:12:00.001-05:00

The Christmas Angel - A Poem

As the title suggests, this a poem about a Christmas, tree-top, angel-ornament. Written around Christmas time, 2001, the poem steps out of my usual writing voice and comes from imagination. Focusing on the "peace on Earth" message that are suspended from the angel's hands, the poem is pretty much simply a poem/prayer for peace, written by someone who is not a religious person but who isn't completely closed to the idea of spiritual possibilities either.

How Can We Deal With Regrets In A Way That Makes Them Less Painful?

2011-11-15T05:23:00.002-05:00

How Can We Deal With Regrets In A Way That Makes Them Less Painful?

Needless to say, having regret(s) isn't easy to deal with. I recently ran into a question that asked for people's thoughts on how to keep regret from becoming to stressful/painful. This is a Hub I wrote in response to that question. It's not expert advice, and I don't even if know if my approach is a good one. It is, however, what's always helped me (at least some) to live with regrets I have.

Mall Rats

2011-11-12T03:41:00.001-05:00

Mall Rats

This is a fictional story that's mainly a matter of my own trying to be a playful with creative writing than it is a matter of being a "great" story. Apologies to anyone who takes the time to read it. Sometimes a writer needs to do a little experimenting.

Hostile or Nasty Feedback In Online Writing

2011-11-11T06:36:00.001-05:00

Hostile or Nasty Feedback In Online Writing

Ordinarily, most of us have learned not to pay any attention to nasty remarks made on our writing or sent as a result of someone's reading it online. There's a difference, of course, between "nasty remarks" and "negative feedback" or "criticism". This Hub about "nasty remarks" is NOT about negative feedback and/or crticism, and it's not about people's offering opposing opinions or asking for clarification. It's about people choice to try to insult or otherwise verbally "attack" the writer, rather than the writing and/or the content.

Positive Thinking, Negative Thinking - A Personal Discussion About What Too Few People Understand

2011-11-11T05:40:00.001-05:00

Positive Thinking, Negative Thinking - A Personal Discussion About What Too Few People Understand

Positive thinking can seem to be a fairly simple matter. Either we think and act with a positive attitude or we don't. Things aren't always that simple, however - especially when the person in question has had enough life experience to find that making his way to "positive" can take more skill and determination than it does in the life with far fewer negative experiences.

October Storm - A Poem

2011-11-07T12:01:00.001-05:00

October Storm - A Poem

This is a poem about storms of the "meteorological event" nature, but of the "storms-of-life" nature. Regardless of the type of storm, the message of the poem is about how when storms come too soon and/or when they just aren't generally expected, they can cause different kinds of, and often more, damage to those who must get through them safely.

The Swimmer - A Poem

2011-11-04T12:22:00.000-04:00

The Swimmer - A Poem

"Words Not Written" by Lisa H. Warren

2011-10-04T13:45:00.001-04:00

To write words that must not be read,

and must not see the light of day,

and say the words that should be said,

and words one plans to never say

There's something to be said for that;

but then again, there's something not to.

Those words one really shouldn't say,

and those one really ought to.

The line and gap between these things

a longing to a writer brings

and words not spoken, whispered,

written;

left, instead, to silence and to hearts,

and whisper when the writing starts

or stops and alters its direction -

never to be heard or read

while "just as well," it's often said.

And, yet in longing whispers call

in ways heard, but on deaf ears fall.

The writer chooses carefully

which words he'll let somebody see,

and which he doesn't care about -

like trash deemed fit for tossing out.

And so the writer keeps pretending

not to hear the longing,

never-ending.

Negative ("Bad") Behavior in Children - When Is It Ignoring It Better? When Is Ignoring It Not An Option?

2011-09-29T06:08:00.002-04:00

Negative ("Bad") Behavior in Children - When Is It Ignoring It Better? When Is Ignoring It Not An Option?

Someone online asked opinions about whether "bad" behavior in children should be ignored and recognized as "just part of a stage that will be outgrown" or whether children should be "punished" (not a word I'm a big fan of). The thing is, though, that the answer to that question isn't a simple one. This is a discussion about all the things I think people need to consider. And, the short answer to that question is, I think, that it depends on the child, the age, and the circumstances (although there's a difference between "addressing" the situation, possibly with consequences; and "punishing").

Being A Left-Handed or Both-Handed Person in a Seemingly Right-Handed World

2011-09-29T04:35:00.001-04:00

Being A Left-Handed or Both-Handed Person in a Seemingly Right-Handed World

Having seen a few too many online comments that really indicated ignorance about people (particularly children) who use their left hand to write, I thought I'd try to - if nothing else - kind of de-mystify left-handedness (for those people who, for some reason, sometimes see something mystical, or worse, in left-handedness.

The House with the Porch and the Stairs and the Fence - A Poem

2011-09-28T04:39:00.000-04:00

The House with the Porch and the Stairs and the Fence - A Poem

Unfinished Feminism: Live and Learn

2011-09-26T13:23:00.000-04:00

Unfinished Feminism: Live and Learn: Having hit my teen years and early adulthood in a time when the idea that girls/women could want "more than just being a wife and mother" ha...

Just Some "Inside-Baseball" ("Inside-Writing", actually) Thoughts As I Begin A New Phase of My Online Efforts

2011-09-25T14:59:00.004-04:00

When I first began setting up what was then a few blogs for the purpose of organizing a growing collection of writing pieces, the first thing I did was set up "Lisa's Collection". Since I'd written on a wide variety of subjects, I figured "Lisa's Collection" would make a good central blog that would act as both a "writer's blog" and a central point from which to operate between the different subjects and different blogs. Over the years, "Lisa's Collection" has turned into a weird mix of all kinds of different things, as well as a case of way-too-much "inside-baseball" that's related pretty much only to explaining why the blog exists in the first place. So, I haven't been all that satisfied or comfortable with that particular blog. Then again, since it's been around for awhile, and since it has consistently been the place around which I've centered a lot of my online writing activites I haven't quite felt ready to take it offline. With my online writing efforts being something I take seriously, but also something I've engaged in in what I think of as "skimmed time", I've always believed that adding some of that "inside-baseball" stuff has been a way for me to present some writing in some cohesive way.

As a freelance writer who also writes in her spare/skimmed time, I've always been trying to straddle some line between "professional" and "serious" and "personal". What was once a fairly inner challenge (trying to straddle that line) has, over time, become something that would be pretty obvious to anyone who may run into my online writing. More importantly, a lot of the "inside-baseball" stuff and the "laying-the-foundation-for-future-efforts" has grown into what looks to me like a giant mess of online writing, as well as way too much explaining and far too little actually accomplishing the aim of packaging up my writing in way that doesn't offer more of that "inside-baseball" stuff than it really needs to.

In any case (and in spite of the fact that this post is yet one more "inside-baseball" type of thing), after over-five-years since I began writing online, my overall collection of efforts has reached a point where I'm finally ready to do some real housecleaning and re-packaging. A lot of the blogs that have been acting as foundation on which future efforts related to a subject can be built have now reached the stage where I can see what's what, what I have, and what needs to be done in order to make them more than just "foundations".

I've also reached a point where, although I do want to "renovate" and further build some of those blogs, I'd also like to "bury" some of them at least enough that they won't be in the foreground of my latest writing efforts and packaging. I've already deleted a couple of them and have decided to instead incorporate their subjects into the "Lisa's Collection" writer's blog.

In any case, inside-baseball or not, I guess I thought it might make some sense to get these thoughts down here, partly because it always helps to get plans, to-do lists, and thoughts into writing; but partly, too, because as my overall collection of online efforts has grown (and become, perhaps, an increasingly blended mix of "all-writer-all-the-time", "all-writing-all-the-time" and "all kinds of other things"), I continue to feel the need to clarify and explain what the heck my efforts, aims, and intentions are.

I guess the thing is that sometimes I'm a writer and nothing but a writer. Sometimes I'm someone who writes online (which is, but isn't always, different from being a "writer and nothing but a writer"). Then again, much of the time I write for reasons that have nothing to do with writing and something to do with any number of things other than writing.

In any case, I'm entering a new stage of my online efforts (and introducing some new offline efforts as well). This post is just an update that isn't likely to interest anyone other than me. (Sorry about that, but we writers tend to be "expressers-of-thoughts", regardless of whether they're interesting to anyone else or not.)

Life on Key: Most Recent Hubs

2011-09-25T07:56:00.000-04:00

Life on Key: Most Recent Hubs: Some of the more recent posts on here are links to things I've written over the course of the last couple of months or so. I've been in the...

My Daughter's Engagement: Whoa. Sinking In. (Just saying)

2011-09-12T18:49:00.003-04:00

My Daughter's Engagement: Whoa. Sinking In. (Just saying) (Not much more to add than that, so no need to click on this link.)

My Daughter's Engagement: Big Day the Day Before Yesterday (September 10)

2011-09-12T18:48:00.000-04:00

My Daughter's Engagement: Big Day the Day Before Yesterday (September 10): We spent Saturday afternoon at the bridal shop and we now know what the wedding dress is going to be. It's absolutely beautiful. It's not ...

Some Challenges and Issues of Selecting the Right Kind of Mother-of-the-Bride Dress

2011-09-12T17:22:00.000-04:00

Some Challenges and Issues of Selecting the Right Kind of Mother-of-the-Bride Dress

Choosing A Historic Estate As A Perfect Wedding Venue

2011-09-08T05:50:00.000-04:00

Choosing A Historic Estate As A Perfect Wedding Venue

Disabled Comment Capsules on Hubs

2011-09-05T13:03:00.000-04:00

Disabled Comment Capsules on Hubs

Of HubPages, Panda, Subdomains, Traffic and a Not-So-"Mentally-Healthy" and Apparent Obessesion

2011-09-02T10:39:00.002-04:00

Those of us who have been writing on HubPages experienced major drops in traffic when Google changed its algorithms in a way that resulted in a site-wide "slap". The change in algorithms has become known as "Panda" across the Internet, and anyone familiar the Internet-world-shaking changes knows that the rolling out of "Panda" has been quite the big deal on a lot of sites. HubPages was one of those sites.

In the HubPages community the word of the hour, word of the day, and word of the year was "Panda". That it is until, in response to Panda, talk of giving each contributor (Hubber) his own subdomain within HubPages began. After that that, the word of the hour, day, and year seemed to change from "Panda" to "subdomains"; and an epic-drama within another epic-drama began to both spin off from, but also remain part of, the overall one.

From the subdomain epic-drama spun off a roller-coaster ride of traffic increases and drops between different Hubbers, but also at times for the same contributor. Essentially, a lot of upheaval and uncertainy has gone on for a lot of Hubbers (more for some than others) - and thus has been the state-of-affairs for a lot of HubPages writers for six months now.

The original Panda storm was something that affected the whole site; but I suspect once subdomains were introduced, eliminating that particular aspect of the upheaval, a lot of members may have resumed (as they say) "regular programming" and business as usual (well, maybe not quite "as usual"). Without re-hashing the details of all the events, a certain amount of upheaval seemed to settled down after the introduction of subdomains. On the other hand, and as evidenced by the many discussions on HubPages' forums, a lot of people didn't resume business as usual. Some resumed business, but not "as usual", because many seemed to be spending a lot of time on the forums, trying to figure out what was happening with everyone else in the community and with the site in general. I was among that latter group.

I hate to make the following comparison, but when Panda first showed up I was glued to the screen in much the same way I'd been when 911 took place.   The difference (besides the obvious one involving the fact that Internet doings are far from similar to 911) was that with 911 it had been the television screen (and radio). (Again, please forgive the poor comparison.) In any case, with Panda it was the computer screen, but it was also news being sent to me via e.mail by relatives who aren't involved with Internet writing but know I am.   There was even a phone call or two aimed at telling me what my non-Internet-writing relatives had heard, or read, in the news. In the HubPages community, links to one interview or another were showing up from one direction or another.

For me, such intent focus on this Internet-wide event died down to some extent after the first day, but only some. In the days to follow my own degree of "paying attention" and trying to figure out what I should be doing next remained fairly high.   I'd go to the forums to see what was happening, get involved in reading (or participating in) threads that usually amounted to a lot of collective wheel-spinning, as well as my own, individual and private, weighing of what appeared to be happening to what, and whom. So it was pretty draining.

Just as some of the intensity and newness of it all had seemed to die down a little, HubPages introduced subdomains in July. That's when the epic Panda drama stepped to the side (a little, anyway) and made room for the companion epic-drama, "Subdomains". The subdomains drama has been a long-running one on the HubPages community now, but even it has become slightly less the main focus with some recent, dramatic, traffic increases and drops that have been taking place as a result of the very subdomains that were spun off from the Panda drama.

Subdomains almost (ALMOST) seemed to have settled in when the traffic changes suddenly hit. That was, I believe, about a week ago (although I've often been so engrossed in the minute-to-minute goings on that I may have lost a little track of which Thursday night it was that the traffic climbs began to scare some people. In any case, things improved for a lot of people but not all. Then, too, some of the people who saw those dramatic traffic increases later saw dramatic drops in it. The word, "roller coaster", shows up often in community discussions. The whole thing has been interesting, to say the least. The collective efforts to try to improve the situation, as well as the collective attempts to try to figure out who may have done what wrong, has both united and divided the community at one time or another.

As a writer, there are things I've seen happening that I do think are encouraging. It's not al bleak and upheaval. Still, there's no denying the upheaval that continues to exist. A good number of people (I'm one) think it will take quite a bit more time before things really settle (if they ever do; nobody's sure they will). In the meantime, it hasn't helped that my offline projects have been slow toward the end of Summer, because I've had all the time in the world to "just check" the forums, which really means often being drawn like a moth to a flame to one of the subdomains or traffic threads, only to take a temporary break (never far away from the draining threads, and usually without leaving the forums) before heading back to one of those wheel-spinning threads again.

My usual (non-late-Summer) "system" is to leave up HubPages forums in a separate window and pop on and off from time to time whenever I want to take a break from working. Since Panda, each time I've started to drift away from the regular and intense focus of the latest goings-on, some new thing would happen and re-ignite the interest, fascination, and attempt to become both amateur detective and "larger/smaller picture specialist".

The only thing that has assured me that I haven't become a complete forum addict is that I know I wouldn't have had the time to spend so much of the last month or so engaged in the collective wheel-spinning on the forums if I'd had more work to do offline. I was pretty much in the process of phasing away from the high-intensity interest when the traffic roller-coaster began a week or so ago. As it looks to me now, a lot of people are still enjoying high traffic, but many have been tosssed to depths when it comes to traffic. There are, of course, some who say nothing much has changed with them over the last six months. The name for people who enjoyed the dramatic increase in traffic, only to have dramatic drops, has become known as "plungers". Recently, even plungers have again enjoyed increases; so there's at least the possibility that with a little more time some of those plungers will see things improve. As it is now, I've got my own fingers crossed but am prepared to start diving at any time.

It's nice to see things improving for yet more people. Still, I've just had to decide that I'm going to stop paying attention to any of it for now. I've had nothing much else to do in recent weeks (projects slow; so I had the luxury of paying attention to the roller coaster), but it's Labor Day weekend; and next week things get busy again. Things look good enough for me for now, and if I get "sandboxed" (or anything like that) - well, whatever..   I've just gotten to where I think (at least with me) there has to be some cut-off point for paying daily attention. If traffic starts to slip it gets ominous seeming. It it's at an all time high there's the tension of waiting to see if it starts to slip (or take a giant dive, not that that's happened to me yet recently). If somebody else's traffic takes a dive I start thinking mine is next.

I'm not suggesting anyone else do this (at all), but I think I'm going to call this the "cut-off point" and close the book on the epic drama that has been the Panda/subdomain thing; at least unless/until some new, big, dramatic thing happens. Whatever goes on, goes on. Hopefully, what goes on will be reasonably OK. If it isn't I'll do the next thing. It's time (for me anyway) to concentrate on either spiffing up existing Hubs or writing new ones and stop checking my traffic every "ten minutes" and trying to keep up with what's going on site-wide (and Google-wise) as far as traffic goes. It can just get too mentally draining after the first six months or so of such intent paying-attention.   :lol:   I switched to my subdomain around the first week of July and started paying attention to all the talk about how having subdomains would be "the worst thing in the world".

Wishing everyone with traffic increases luck in keeping them, and everyone with drastic drops luck in turning them around. Happy Labor Day (to U.S. Hubbers). I can feel my "brain energy" rushing back as I write (well, at least as much as I would have otherwise had without the "paying attention", especially since the subdomain switch.

What I'd Tell A Grade-School Child Who is Afraid of a Hurricane On the Way

2011-08-27T02:45:00.000-04:00

What I'd Tell A Grade-School Child Who is Afraid of a Hurricane On the Way

Giving Money to Beggars and Homeless People

2011-08-18T07:33:00.000-04:00

Giving Money to Beggars and Homeless People

Fighting Depression, Exhaustion Without Medication

2011-08-16T07:32:00.000-04:00

Fighting Depression, Exhaustion Without Medication

An American's Thoughts To, And For, England (August 11, 2011)

2011-08-12T05:00:00.000-04:00

An American's Thoughts To, And For, England (August 11, 2011)

Writing Engaging and Interesting Non-Fiction Stories Without Embellishing the Truth

2011-07-29T03:11:00.000-04:00

Writing Engaging and Interesting Non-Fiction Stories Without Embellishing the Truth

Duplicate Content on HubPages and Elsewhere, Before and After Rule Changes (and Panda)

2011-07-22T17:42:00.000-04:00

Duplicate Content on HubPages and Elsewhere, Before and After Rule Changes (and Panda)

How to Keep Kids From Acting Up (Being Out-of-Control)

2011-07-21T16:54:00.000-04:00

How to Keep Kids From Acting Up (Being Out-of-Control)

That Thing I Need to Write

2011-07-15T02:16:00.000-04:00

That Thing I Need to Write

Is Dying For A Cause Ever A Viable Option

2011-07-09T07:46:00.000-04:00

Is Dying For A Cause Ever A Viable Option

Defining the Word, "Leaving", in Internet Terms

2011-06-19T12:40:00.000-04:00

Defining the Word, "Leaving", in Internet Terms

The Evolution of Internet-Writing Culture (And Of My Own Aims, As Well)

2011-06-15T22:22:00.000-04:00

For quite awhile now (and long before Panda), I've been in the process of evaluating my own efforts in Internet writing. The result has been setting up the site linked to at the top of this page. (Lisa H Warren)

Since it seemed like a good time to put all that wheel-spinning and evaluating in writing, I've taken some rainy-day time to do just that. This is the link:

The Evolution of, and Revolution in, Internet Writing - One Writer's Perspectives and Observations

What Teens and Young Adults Need to Understand About Parents - Part I, "The Basics"

2011-06-07T02:35:00.000-04:00

What Teens and Young Adults Need to Understand About Parents - Part I, "The Basics"

Why Some Relationships Don't Last

2011-06-05T10:12:00.000-04:00

Why Some Relationships Don't Last

Is It Normal for A Couple Married Five Years or More to Disagree on Family Budget?

2011-06-02T02:51:00.000-04:00

Is It Normal for A Couple Married Five Years or More to Disagree on Family Budget?

Memorial Day, Remembering Someone I Never Knew

2011-06-02T02:46:00.000-04:00

Memorial Day, Remembering Someone I Never Knew

Birth Parents and Ancestors - Is There A Cut-Off Age When We No Longer Want or Need to Know About Them?

2011-06-02T02:44:00.000-04:00

Birth Parents and Ancestors - Is There A Cut-Off Age When We No Longer Want or Need to Know About Them?

My Writing Identity-Crisis, Part One

2011-05-23T09:04:00.000-04:00

I've been in the middle of a big "writing-identity" crisis since I first signed up to write online because the "person-me" enjoys writing. The "business-me" takes writing, editing, research (and whatever else) projects in the offline world and completely unrelated to the Internet. The business-me has from time to time dabbled in writing Internet articles for other people/businesses and for "conventional" pay, but we all know how low that "conventional" pay can be for Internet article writers. I like my "day-job" work OK, but a) it isn't my dream job, and b) it isn't the kind of money I need in order to live in the area/economic times that I do. Freelancing has been a second-career type of thing that I turned to when I couldn't find a good enough full-time job in a bad economy. It made sense because I've always been (I like to think) good at writing and liked it, and I had a blip on my resume that would include some 1980's writing clips/project if I hadn't left it off.   :/ In any case, I don't have my dream job during the day. With freelancing, there's often the need to scrape and scrap for the next work and dealing with the whole business that takes place every time some potential new project/contract comes along. Finding a few "regulars" for whom to work can help cut down on the "un-fun" need to do too much scraping or scrapping. With a few regulars, however, the price one risks paying can be linked to the "eggs-in-one (or three)-basket(s)" thing, so having a regular or two can create a false sense of security for any writer who is willing to trust his own business to the business of that one or two regulars.

Scraping and scrapping for new work, on the other hand, can tend to bring an ever-present sense of insecurity that is far from a false one.

I've spent a lot of time accepting that a lot of people in the world don't have their dream job or business. I'm well aware of the reality that the world is full of people who don't have their dream job. It's also full of people who are satisfied to know that any job can be dream job enough when it keeps over a roof over one's head, feeds one's children, and maybe even leaves a little left over for building other incomes and/or saving.

Actually, after years of some of the non-work-related stuff going on in my life, my dream job at this point might actually be "no job".   :lol:

The business-me isn't above cashing in on my ability to put together whatever it is someone else wants me to write in order to make the money I need to live.   Neither is the business-me unwilling to set aside years' worth of hard-earned background in an area completely unrelated to writing, and find ways to make what once mattered on my resume seem to at least remotely relate, and therefore kind of matter, to anyone considering hiring me for their writing-related project(s). I am, after all a grown-up - and who has that business-me that knows the value of adjusting to changes in economic climates, industry changes, and even personal circumstances.

In truth, it isn't so difficult to be "unwilling to set aside years' worth of hard-earned background" when that hard-earned background has already has some fractures in it as a result of personal choices. See, that's where the person-me made things that much more complicated for the business-me. The person part of me has been a woman since - oh, I guess - the 1970's. Before that, the person part of me was a girl.

Back in the 1970's when I was just starting out as a grown-up I did what so many other young women do, which was to focus on working my way up the corporate ladder.    Of course, being young and just starting out, I didn't realize how quickly the mid-70's would turn into the late 70's; so before I knew it, I was getting married but also involved in adopting a baby (long story that I won't go into here).   The person-me and the business-me were actually getting along quite well at that time. (There was a whole set of circumstances that, when combined, meant the whole picture wasn't all that complicated or challenging. Again, long story that I won't go into here.) There's no doubt, however, that starting a family did have its impact on that corporate-ladder-climbing that I'd had in mind. If I think of the "scheme of all corporate-ladder-climbing" in the world, I have to say that I never actually made my way to even the middle of any corporate ladders. At the time, and considering my age then, being on the low rungs of a ladder didn't feel like a permanent thing. I could see what was ahead and what would be required, as far as any climbing went. When you're just starting out in the world of being a grown-up, all you can see is an outline of your own future. When it comes to how you'll fill in that outline, all you can really do is imagine it.

Well actually, when I said that the person-me and business-me were getting along well, I meant "for awhile". The thing with ladder rungs is this: When you start to go from the lowest ones to the next ones up, somewhere along the way people start wantiing you to do things like travel and be happy to stay until "all hours" at the drop of a hat because the company president suddenly wants something like a set of figures that are going to take several hours, and several people's worth of input, to put together. That's when the rubber really starts to meet the road. Or, should I say, that's when the sole really meets the ladder rung? Or, then again, might it be more appropriate for me to say that that's when the SOUL meets the ladder rung?

When it comes down to it, that person-me is actually the whole me. The business-me is really only a part of me. When the soul (or the sole) meets the rungs, it turns out the part of a person that gets the best footing can often be that whole person - not just a part of her.

The business-me AND the person-me did what so many other women do when the role of mother is introduced to the picture, and that was to discover the reality that life isn't a simple matter of person-me and business-me once a child comes along. A whole new set of "me definitions" emerged. First, there was the "whole me". That me was divided into the "me as just me", which was further divided into that old person-me and then into the separate business-me. Another part of my identity was "the mother me", which was in its own category and yet also had been assimilated into "the whole me". As most mothers will tell you, I'll tell you that the whole identity thing became quite the complicated affair.

I'd later discover that the divisions get even more complicated as each new child comes along.

What we women often learn (at least those of us with all those "me's") is that we need to find a way to make them all co-exist happily. Why? Because having all those me's means having a full, whole, life. Abandoning any of those identities means abandoning, or at least postponing, having that full life. To one extent or another, and depending on the job and the number of children a woman has, all those identities do fight with each other in any number of minor and major ways.

We've all heard the saying, "You can have it all, but you can't always have it all at the same time."   Well, like so many young people, I believed I could have it all because I knew how "smart" I was at managing myself and my life. Maybe SOME people couldn't have it all, but that was SOME people (maybe even most people). It wasn't me. I was, I thought (as so many young people do) different from all those other people. I looked around at what I'd accomplished and all the odds I'd overcome, and I looked all the way back from childhood to the then present and saw someone who had always found getting what she wanted, and proving "everyone else" and conventional wisdom wrong, fairly effortless.   I made sure any confidence I had had been based on reality, not just thin air; and I used every little bit and piece of reality for building a foundation of confidence in my own ability to have it all, do it all, and give 120% or more to any number of things at the same time. Of course, there is no such thing as 120% of anything, and part of that whole picture I mentioned was reduced work hours and a mother who was so close to my son I was convinced that her taking care of him while I worked was as good as my caring for him.

In fact, with the reduced hours giving me time with him, I saw his time with my mother as "something extra", not "something less", in his life.

The minor issues I'd noticed as I'd begun to work my way up were, in fact, fairly minor. The business-me knew how to deal with such minor issues. ("After all, I wasn't just capable, hard-working, and business-minded. I was skilled with dealing with people and situations.")

Life often has a way of teaching young, confident, people that all is not determined by intelligence, skill, performance, willingness to work, and determination. No, life sometimes has its own agenda for us; and sometimes as that agenda for us is thrown like a monkey wrench into our previously neat and well managed lives, we can both have our previously naive sureness threatened and also find new building blocks for a new, but different, kind of confidence.

Life had its own agenda for me when the time came for me to have our second child.   All seemed to be going according to plan until complications arose with the pregnancy that would otherwise not have posed too much challenge when it came to my work responsibilities, and even forward progress. When I say, "complications", I really mean "complications". They were complications that lasted for 20 weeks, and completely separate complications resulted at work, against the backdrop of all that a woman experiences as she fears the baby she's expecting will not survive. If there's one thing that can let a whole lot of air out of that "confidence balloon" of being young and sure, it's having a life that had seemed to be close to fairy-tale perfection suddenly involve the very un-fairy-tale-like matters of threatened miscarriage and fetal heartbeats that seem ominously and terrifyingly silent.

After having "the fetal remains" removed at 20 weeks, I returned to work the day after I got out of the hospital. Sad as it all was, I had visions of returning to my pre-miscarriage, almost-perfect, life and moving on in the same direction I've been moving.   I continued working for awhile, and I kept my youthful sureness of my own ability to put things in perspective and certainly not let one bad event affect the rest of my life. This was the early eighties, though, and there were some slowdowns taking place. That meant that projects once said to be waiting for approval seemed to remain in a perpetual state of waiting for approval. I understood the need for belt-tightening, and I under that it wasn't permanent. Still, in times when things aren't looking good work- and income-wise, it can be difficult to keep feeling sure. Any sensible person (especially a sensible business person) knows that feeling sure of some things really isn't always the most realistic way to feel.

The miscarriage, as it turned out, had taught me yet one other lesson. That was that even when we feel confident in our own ability to put the big, bad, things in life in perspective; and even when we rely on our own strength and solid thinking to overcome grief; how much of the "small-stuff crap" we're willing to tolerate changes. When life is close to a fairy-tale, and when we're feeling "all happy and secure", it's not too difficult to put up with a few setbacks or uncertainties in something like the work setting. When you're already "not in the mood for any crap" it doesn't take too long before the exit door starts looking like an entrance to a new and better life.

When you're on the lower rungs of a ladder, and all you can see is that outline for what's ahead, there's not much solid above you that appears to anything much to hold onto. Also, from those lower rungs of a ladder, there's not a lot of risk involved in jumping off.

When I walked through that exit door and found my high-heeled shoes treading carefully on the light blanket of snow that had covered the parking lot, I guess you could say that was when the soul hit the road in a couple of different ways.

Clearly, if I was going to find a way for all those different "identities" of mine to happily co-exist, the terms under which the business-me operated would have to be my own. I was no longer a 22/23-year-old girl starting life as a grown-up. I had those high-heeled shoes of mine firmly dug into the challenges and realities of building a family, learning how to process and overcome a kind of grief that I hadn't before run into in my life.

My plan was to do contract work and build up my own business that way. My plan was also to have that second child I'd thought I'd planned for before. The plan for the contract work started out OK. The plan for the second child wasn't going so well. Back to that lesson about how life sometimes gives us what we don't want: It also sometimes doesn't give us what we do want. I don't know if everyone learns this stuff, and when anyone else does. I was about 28 when I figured it out.

Sometimes, it turns out, life just may not give us what we want when we want it. I was 29 when my little son was born. Having that healthy pregnancy took a worrisomely long time to happen, and life (or something) decided that my little son would arrive 6 weeks earlier than he should have. Having a premie brings with it its own set of experiences, and sometimes those heels I had so firmly dug into reality seemed to sink a little farther down into it than was comfortable. Then again, I was floating on air. This was yet another lesson I learned: We can be solidly and firmly grounded in reality, floating on air, and eve sinking into a little bit of quicksand - all at the same time. It turned out, I'd discovered, that we (especially, maybe, women and mothers) don't just discover increasing complications as we discover new identities and part of ourselves.   We discover that what we're doing, or how we're feeling, at any given time is no longer about just "me and how I how feel at the moment". It becomes about "all the parts of me, and all the different ways I feel about any number of different things at any given time".

Pondering in the Wee Hours of Thursday Morning

2011-05-19T03:32:00.000-04:00

It's 3:25 a.m., and I've been sitting here, staring at this monitor screen, for a few hours now. Why? I don't know. Well, I know, but I'm too tired to write about it. I've been up since around 5:00 a.m.; but between some time on the Internet, and the 11:00 p.m. local news, a few things have gotten me thinking that there's something I need to write. The trouble is, when all is said and done, a person can't really think to write when she's been up since 5:00 a.m..

In any case, I've been sitting here, staring at the screen and listening to music, trying to think of what I should write first. So now, I've used up the few hours I would have had, thinking about what I wanted to write while getting farther and farther away from yesterday's 5:00 a.m. (and closer and closer to today's upcoming 5:00 a.m.). Time to pack it in and forget about writing for now. I'll be back when I'm feeling more awake.

"Why I Write" (An Answer to a Question Someone Asked)

2011-05-19T03:21:00.000-04:00

Mainly, I write because I enjoy it. Also, though, I write for money. I don't write because I have nothing better to do, because I write in spite of having a lot of better, and more pressing, things I should be doing. I REALLY don't write for fame, because that's the last thing I want. I don't write to impress anyone, because I'm not one to try to impress people. Neither do I write to communicate my thoughts because I don't presume people care about what my thoughts are (and I'm fine keeping so many of my thoughts to myself anyway).

I write because I think too many important ideas and feelings get "lost to the winds" when people don't capture them (for, maybe, future grandchildren/great-grandchildren) in writing.

I write because I like the clicking of the keys.

I write because there are things I've learned about life, and I hate to have what I've learned wasted by keeping it to myself.

I write because I like the idea of maybe "giving someone a little ride" (with some kinds of writing).

I write because I like to be someone who lets other people know they aren't alone.

I write because I tend to live with chronic dissatisfaction and anger in this world, so I feel as if my head will explode if I don't put it into civilized words, put order to the thoughts, and free my head of a lot of it.

I write because too many people misunderstand too many other people, and if I think I can share something I know about some of those "other people", maybe it will help someone understand them better.

I write to defend people I think need defending - some children, elderly people, anyone in a group that is treated poorly, the poor, the wealthy, and on and on and on. I don't like it when people would prefer to feel superior to someone else, rather than try to understand them. So, I write to try to share what I can about understanding some of those people who could use as many people speaking up on their behalf as possible. I write because too many parents don't seem understand their children or even recall being a child themselves. I write because too many kids truly don't understand where their parents are coming from.

I write because I'm angry at a world that so often treats and sees women the way it does.

I write because I've learned that keeping my thoughts and activities to myself resulted in my being shocked to discover other people would, if given the chance or reason, imagine what I "must be thinking" - and the form opinions of me based on what they imagine! :rolleyes: So, I write because I've learned the hard way (at least for me) that saying what I'm thinking is safer than not. (It's a problem some women/wives/daughters have more than some other people.)

I write because I imagine that one day my grown kids will find what I've written and understand their mother just that much better (even though now we're far closer than a lot of moms and grown kids are).

I write because I love to put the words together in a way that (hopefully, and when I do it right) makes them become something more than just words on paper or a screen, and makes them become something almost tangible.

I write because when I think of the reasons why I write it makes my heart pound a little and makes me feel just a little on the edge of tears - maybe.

I write because I can (or at least I think I can).

I write because I love the order and science and logic of thoughts put into the right words.

I write because today's world so often seems to have forgotten the importance and power of words, and instead seems so often to think the only thing there is that matters is technology. It's as if the world has forgotten the role of words and writing throughout history. (Coming from the Boston area, where it was words and ideas at the root of the founding of the country that would become what America has; I've always been particularly aware of the power of words and ideas. So, in ways, I write because I want to help keep the world from forgetting what words can do.)

I write because, in a world where so many people hate to have to write something or where so many struggle with writer's block or grammar rules, it comes fairly easily to me - so I figure I may as well go with it.

I write because, as middle-aged as I may be, I still have it in my head that there's always the chance I'll write the thing that helps change the world.

I write because I imagine that something I write may somehow manage to help my children know how much I love them.

I write because I like presenting arguments.

I write because I think the most difficult way to "paint a picture" is through the use of something as "dull" and "black-and-white" as letters and words - so I write because it's a challenge.

I write because I like to play with words.

I write because it's separate from the person people see and hear when I'm speaking in person, and from the person about whom others so often seem to make misguided judgments based only on what they see and hear.

I write because writing won't let me go.

I write because I'm in my element when I'm writing.

I write because, in a world and a life in which I seem to have a tendency to have been knocked around quite a bit, writing is the thing that helps keep me grounded in my "me-ness".

I write because writing is as much a part of who I am as my light brown hair and gray-blue eyes are.

I write because the words are there.

And, when the words are not there, I know just where to go to find them.

Welcome to "Bright and Sunny" Massachusetts

2011-05-17T18:19:00.000-04:00

Remind me not to forget where my sunglasses have been laying around, doing nothing, for the last - what - month and a half? Year and a half? You know the song, "The Sun'll Come Out Tomorrow?" (from "Annie") Well, the sun won't be coming out tomorrow either.

I have no real point in commenting on our miserable weather here. Let's just say I'm on strike until that sun finally does come out; so, in the meantime, I'm not doing anything at all - except for complaining and/or doing other meaningless things online.

Happy Easter (to Anyone Who Celebrates It)

2011-04-23T02:58:00.000-04:00

Adopting My Son

2011-04-22T02:28:00.001-04:00

I've been putting together a number of different pieces of writing, and this story is part of a larger one.

http://memoriesmagicandmeltdowns.blogspot.com/2011/04/adopting-my-son-part-of-my-personal.html

Adapting to a Changing Internet Climate - My Way

2011-04-19T21:37:00.000-04:00

Although all the recent changes in the "Internet Climate" (PANDA) have caused me to do the same thinking, and re-thinking, that so many other Internet writers have been doing; my own "stewing" over exactly what kind of stuff I do, or don't, write online has been going on for some time. The following piece of writing is pretty much a matter of my "thinking in typing" - probably as a way of trying to define some of the issues that have resulted for me (alone, as well as for some others as well), as a result of recent changes in Internet standards.

https://sites.google.com/site/lisahwarren/adapting-to-a-changing-internet-climate

First Love - By Lisa H. Warren

2011-04-09T03:43:00.000-04:00

Forever was never on my mind,

nor thoughts of time at all;

and yet moments spent together

were measured

in moments left,

but never moments left behind.

Moments seeming never-ending,

yet, as well, too brief

for hearts so young.

Forever was never on my mind

when moments whispered, "always",

oblivious to time.

Fairy dust, magic, love songs;

kisses that happened

or promised to happen -

but sometimes didn't matter,

for Valentine cards were

their own kind of kisses

to save in a scrapbook,

and treasure forever.

First love, we learn,

to our dismay and gratitude,

like silver-haired dandelions,

falls apart and flies away.

And with it, takes the

fairy dust and magic,

the love songs, and kisses that happened

or didn't, and now never will.

More fragile than snowflakes,

or butterfly wings;

memories of magic

that grow beyond tears;

when off to the winds

silver-haired dandelions flew,

forever was never on mind.

Yet forever I'll always remember

those moments and magic,

long after first love

flew away.

Rainbows - By Lisa H. Warren

2011-04-09T03:24:00.000-04:00

When storm clouds gather, and

the chilling rain pours down;

and even the tallest and the strongest trees

stand, battered.

When it somehow seems,

there are only broken dreams;

and we're certain we have been

abandoned by the sun;

Then as suddenly as it has come

the rain stops and

out comes the sun,

watercolor ribbons are painted

in the sky.

Perfect, painted ribbons in a perfect, painted, arch -

a gateway to the heavens,

a whisper to the soul.

A gift of hope,

wrapped in watercolor ribbons

in the sky.

A Well Known and Favorite Quote

2011-04-06T02:41:00.000-04:00

A Well Known and Favorite Quote

Can Offensive Humor Sometimes Be Good?

2011-04-05T07:44:00.000-04:00

Can Offensive Humor Sometimes Be Good?

Review of the Pantech Link 7040

2011-04-04T19:23:00.000-04:00

Review of the Pantech Link 7040

Are People Who Write on the Internet Hiding?

2011-04-04T15:19:00.000-04:00

Are People Who Write on the Internet Hiding?

Someone on HubPages' Forum Asked Whether We, "Hubbers", Were Learning from Writing Our Hubs...

2011-04-04T02:10:00.000-04:00

I wasn't about to post my less-than-enthusiastic thoughts on this matter on that forum, because the people were all fairly new (I think), and I didn't want to throw a great big monkey-wrench into the enthusiastic mood on the thread. Still, I somehow felt the need to just say what I felt like saying. After all, how I feel is more about my own, personal, "writing-identity crisis" and has little to do with HubPages (although it does have a little to do with recent changes in what's considered "acceptable" on a lot of writing sites these days. My un-offered (on there anyway) reply was this:

I didn't already know everything when I started, but I already knew anything I was interested in knowing; and for the most part, my aim was to write about what I did know. (That's what "they" tell writers to write about, after all.) Some people call that "comfort zone". I call it "interest zone" - and there's a big difference. One big problem is that I don't really know anything useful. :/ Another problem is that when I seek to learn something in offline life, it's not particularly something I feel like writing about (because I only want to write about what I already know - not what I'm learning. Yet another problem: I write for other people in my offline life, and it's often writing about things I need to learn about (but am not interested in). Learning about more stuff I'm not interested in just isn't my idea of a great way to "do my own thing" as a writer. :/

To be candid (and also seem a little cynical and/or burned out, I know), I've been researching since around 1979, so I'm pretty much all researched out. I brought whatever I'd learned (from life or research) with me when I started writing Hubs, and I've stayed mainly with writing from that (essentially, assimilated knowledge that can be backed up by earlier research I've done).

My aim right now is stop learning for once in my bloody life, stop writing what other people say I have to write or what other people think I should write, stop trying to squeeze "redeeming value" out of every little shred of everything I ever do in this world - and just waste some time enjoying writing what I enjoy writing (which is often to write something I think a reader or two may enjoy reading - for no reason other than enjoying reading it).

Life on Key: Can Stress Affect Your Unborn Baby?

2011-03-25T00:39:00.000-04:00

Life on Key: Can Stress Affect Your Unborn Baby?: "Research has shown that stress can affect an unborn baby, and extreme stress can increase the incidence of very low birth weight (less than..."

Mothers, Grown Kids, and Growing Up

2011-03-24T03:55:00.000-04:00

Mothers, Grown Kids, and Growing Up

My Life and Times As An Internet Writer: The Truth About Writing-Rules

2011-03-15T03:51:00.000-04:00

My Life and Times As An Internet Writer: The Truth About Writing-Rules: "'The' truth about writing rules is that a writer must have a solid grasp of them. 'My' truth about writing rules is that they are sometimes..."

Thoughts of September

2011-03-11T11:36:00.000-05:00

Thoughts of September

Duplicate Content on HubPages

2011-03-11T07:17:00.000-05:00

Duplicate Content on HubPages

Common Sense Weight Loss - Why You Don't Always Need High-Priced, Complicated, Diet Plans

2011-03-11T05:18:00.000-05:00

Losing weight doesn't have to involve whole, big, elaborate, diet plans. All it takes is a little common sense.

1. Don't eat any refined sugar or "sweets", and don't drink sugary beverages. 2. Limit starches (potato, noodles, pasta, bread, crackers) to one modest portion a day at the most. Eliminate starches when possible. 3. Eat protein. Protein is important, and it fends off hunger best. 4. Don't completely eliminate all fat from the diet. When fat is completely eliminated some people (particularly those with stress) can have fierce, vague, cravings and feel that if they don't eat they won't be able to function. A small serving of cheese or a small serving of whole milk can serve the purpose. 5. Don't add extra calories to meals and beverages. Dressings, mayonnaise, cream in coffee, and other add-ons add hidden calories and fat. 6. If you must cheat plan to cheat on a weekend day. That makes it easier to get through the work week without cheating. Having a couple of slices of pizza on Friday night but eating correctly the rest of the week is usually not what causes people to have a weight problem.

In my common-sense (but admittedly non-expert) opinion, the same applies to holiday eating. The US has five or six holidays that are known for indulging in food and sweets. That's five or six days out of three hundred sixty five days. Weight problems result from day-to-day eating habits, and even binging on those few holidays is generally not the cause of anyone's weight problem.

7. Pay particular attention to the calories in beverages. Drink plain water or other beverages that add close to no calories. 8. Exercise as much as possible. If you can't do any other exercises at least get out and walk several (if not all) of the days in each week. A little walking is better than none. More walking is better still. Slow walking is better than no walking, but brisk-paced walking is even better. 9. Get enough sleep. Being tired throws off a person's system and can contribute to feeling the need to eat in order to get energy. 10. Find ways to relax. Stress causes physiological changes that result in cravings. It is Nature's way of trying to return the body to a non-stress-response state, since living with a chronic stress response is dangerous. The trouble is that Nature has designed our stress response to be alleviated by high-energy foods. Under certain levels of stress the mind and body can sometimes barely function without the "medication" of hormone-altering, high-energy, foods. Finding ways to relax can return the body to a non-stress-response state without the help of high-energy foods.

Is It Only Men Who Are Discriminated Against in Divorce Cases?

2011-03-09T11:55:00.000-05:00

Is It Only Men Who Are Discriminated Against in Divorce Cases?

Who Makes the Better Parent for Children When All Things Are Equal

2011-03-08T20:59:00.000-05:00

Who Makes the Better Parent for Children When All Things Are Equal

The Long Goodbye to Two and a Half Men

2011-02-28T12:35:00.000-05:00

The Long Goodbye to Two and a Half Men

Pondering "Eyes Are the Window to the Soul"

2011-02-23T22:45:00.000-05:00

Pondering "Eyes Are the Window to the Soul"

When You Start Posting Talking Cats It's Time To Take A Break From Writing

2011-02-21T01:16:00.000-05:00

The title of this post pretty much says it all. My plan was to write more about the fact that I'm running out of writing steam (at least for now), but I don't even have the steam to write a post about running out of steam. Basically, I'm going through an "I-hate-all-my-writing" phase. There's so much of it, and such a mix of it, I don't even know what to do with half of it. I'll be back soon (I think) to ponder all this (when I have some steam again).

Xomba - My Own Experience and Impressions

2011-02-20T12:21:00.000-05:00

Xomba - My Own Experience and Impressions

The Myth That Kids Who Aren't Hit or Aren't Punished Don't Respect Parents and Won't Behave Well

2011-02-10T02:02:00.000-05:00

The Myth That Kids Who Aren't Hit or Aren't Punished Don't Respect Parents and Won't Behave Well

Happy Groundhog Day (Spring As Far As I'm Concerned)

2011-02-02T02:29:00.000-05:00

Happy Groundhog Day (Spring As Far As I'm Concerned)

How to dress modestly and stylishly

2011-01-28T12:17:00.000-05:00

How to dress modestly and stylishly

Living With A Close Family Member Who Has Hearing Problems

2011-01-26T06:00:00.000-05:00

Living With A Close Family Member Who Has Hearing Problems

On Being Gracious Versus Not Being Gracious

2011-01-26T03:36:00.000-05:00

On Being Gracious Versus Not Being Gracious

How Long Should You Leave Your Baby to Cry

2011-01-21T18:58:00.000-05:00

How Long Should You Leave Your Baby to Cry

The Finalization of One Adoption, A Personal Story and Quiet Celebration

2011-01-19T18:14:00.000-05:00

The Finalization of One Adoption, A Personal Story and Quiet Celebration

A Portable DVD Player and Hand Held TV

2011-01-16T15:02:00.000-05:00

A Portable DVD Player and Hand Held TV

A Review of MagicJack After Three Years

2011-01-07T18:36:00.000-05:00

A Review of MagicJack After Three Years

Vegetarian and Vegan Foods

2010-12-21T16:40:00.000-05:00

Vegetarian and Vegan Foods

The Organizing and Re-Organizing of Spare-Time Writing Continues....

2010-10-14T07:14:00.000-04:00

As I've mentioned elsewhere on here, I started this blog as a way to have some kind of central place, that would connect my various, spare-time, online, writings.   Whether you make potholders, make jewelry, or collect books in your spare time; after you've done it for awhile whatever it is you've been working on tends to build up into a pile of "miscellany" that requires sorting.

In the years since I began writing on Internet sites I've also begun (apparently) "collecting" blogs, as well. The thinking behind creating blogs (one at a time, of course) has always been that I'd first "lay a foundation" for the theme/subject of the blog, and, over time, continue to build on the foundation. As it is now, I've got a lot of foundations laid, and even the first layer of bricks put down.    None of the blogs is anywhere near as developed as blogs ought to be. Still, I've kind of gone into the blogging thing out of necessity, and in ways, backwards. Some people start blogs and (I guess) are happy to have a blog with little on it for awhile. I don't know...   I always seem to feel the need to explain why the blogs exist at all. Sometimes, when I'm in a particularly harsh and self-judging mode (or else when I'm tired of the whole Internet-writing thing), I'll make all the blogs "by invitation only". Then, I'll regain my confidence enough to just do my own writing my own way, and not worry about who thinks what (or else I'll get a good night's sleep and not be quite so tired of the whole Internet-writing thing for another while) - and put all the blog permission settings back to "allow anybody to read it" (or whatever the wording is).

Recently, or fairly recently anyway, I haven't even been doing much writing at all. Instead, I've been changing the looks of blogs (to the "new" templates, which aren't all that new at this point).    I guess the thing is if you collect books you have to dust them, and probably talk about them with other people who collect books. If you bead you need to re-organize your supplies regularly. If you weave potholders you need to keep ordering whatever those little loopy-string-things are called that people use for weaving potholders.

When Your Computer Gets "CPU Fan Failure" and Shuts Down Within Seconds After Starting It

2010-10-03T13:30:00.000-04:00

When Your Computer Gets "CPU Fan Failure" and Shuts Down Within Seconds After Starting It

Why It's Harder for Adults to Learn a New Language

2010-09-25T00:45:00.000-04:00

Why It's Harder for Adults to Learn a New Language

When Grief Doesn't Seem To Be Getting Better

2010-09-11T05:18:00.000-04:00

When Grief Doesn't Seem To Be Getting Better

Being, or Recognizing, A Credible Internet Writer

2010-09-08T10:50:00.000-04:00

Being, or Recognizing, A Credible Internet Writer

Internet Writer Burnout and Writer's Block

2010-09-04T09:53:00.000-04:00

Internet Writer Burnout and Writer's Block

My Daughter's Engagement: The Engagement Ring - A Surprise for My Daughter

2010-08-09T11:11:00.000-04:00

My Daughter's Engagement: The Engagement Ring - A Surprise for My Daughter: "Last week I received an instant message from my daughter's boyfriend. Since she was working early mornings last week, the IM came after s..."

Why Some Divorces Happen - Myths That Couples Don't Take Vows Seriously

2010-08-05T03:19:00.000-04:00

Why Some Divorces Happen - Myths That Couples Don't Take Vows Seriously

Ode to Forums

2010-08-03T22:30:00.000-04:00

Ode to Forums

Beating The Work From Home Blahs

2010-07-31T06:32:00.000-04:00

Beating The Work From Home Blahs

The Belkin USB Mobile Mouse - A Good, Portable, Lightweight, Mouse

2010-07-30T05:08:00.000-04:00

The Belkin USB Mobile Mouse - A Good, Portable, Lightweight, Mouse

Throwing Things Out Versus Saving Things

2010-07-30T05:05:00.000-04:00

Throwing Things Out Versus Saving Things

Grown Adoptees and Birth Mothers Building A Relationship

2010-07-27T07:18:00.000-04:00

Grown Adoptees and Birth Mothers Building A Relationship